The nine micro- fictions posted earlier,links given in the right hand column, have been consolidated here as an ongoing Novel. The future micro fictional articles will also be added here in the ongoing novel.( The readers not interested in the Real Fiction may kindly see the real fight against Corruption by opening the link: An open Presentation to PM. or by going through various links given in the right hand column below the Introduction, 'About Me'.)
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Chapter 1
Promotion-Promotion
!!
In late eighties, Reno , a Manager of a Government Oil
Company, and four other Officers though quite senior to Reno but not
promoted as ‘Managers’; used to stay in Flats in an LPG Plant in Central
India. Reno was official ‘expert’ in ‘LPG’ though he was very new to it
having just been transferred and promoted from a POL (Petroleum Oil
Lubricants) Depot from North India.
While the four bachelors stayed
without their families; Reno , the most eligible bachelor preferred to
stay with a local beauty better known as ‘Butterfly’. Butterfly was
actually Mami’s daughter. Like her mother, Butterfly too had a penchant
for local hooch known as Santra. And, you know, Mami was attached to the
Chief Plant Manager Satak Pal Sen who was an ardent admirer of Mami and
Santra both. So, Reno had the official and moral duty to follow his
boss in letter and ‘spirit’.
Reno’s favorite hobby, when he was not in the company of
Butterfly, was to train the ‘useless, rigid and stagnated’ Officers like
Bapurao and his three friends on LPG and other subjects he had mastered
through his journey towards this exalted Managerial stardom yet to be
achieved by his seniors, now his ‘boys’.
During one of those alcoholic binges, when his house-hold
items were done topsy-turvy in absence of his Butterfly, by a few
inebriated elements; one ‘useless, rigid and stagnated’ Officer
serendipitously discovered and exclaimed that Reno had a magnificent ass
whose cheeks weighed 20 kg each. The ass used to bend smoothly by 45
degree angle immediately after seeing Reno’s boss. Reno came to be known
as Reno 20W45. (20W40, 15W50 etc. are suffixes used in the nomenclature
of Lubricants by the Oil Companies.)
One fine morning LPG leaked profusely and blissfully from
Knock-Out Drums of the LPG Plant unto a sparking boiler resulting into a
sparkling fire covering even a dome (a Storage Vessel in the shape of
Sphere containing LPG).
And when the dome was burning Reno was fondling…
Butterfly heard the loud noise resulting due to huge
fire, saw the flames from Reno’s Flat, extricated herself as neatly as
she could and started running out of Plant barefoot. Reno gathered his
wits and her sandals. Then followed her. The leak was arrested by the
‘useless and rigid’ boys and the fire got extinguished on its own.
Miraculously, the domes were saved...
The Chief Plant Manager Satak Pal Sen reached Plant after
one hour. Mami and the daughter disappeared into Bandhu’s dhaba outside
the LPG Plant but Reno appeared majestically from somewhere and began
to follow him. The inspection went on for 22 minutes and 35 seconds as
noted by factotum Tandi, Reno’s attendant and Butterfly’s true lover.
There was eerie silence as everybody was struck by the enormity of the
situation. Reno’s mind worked overtime before he broke the silence and
donated his precious expert views, “Sir, I feel LPG leaked from
somewhere.” Wisdom dawned upon everyone and Reno the raconteur explained
how bravely he fought the fire.
The useless, rigid and stagnated Officers muttered in
unison, “Aasoul!!!”. Reno heard it but magnanimously condoned them for
being jealous of his success.
Chief Plant Manager Satak Pal Sen submitted
a report to HQO emphasizing that only a small fire broke out in dry
grass as a careless Oil Tanker driver passing through adjacent POL Depot
approach road threw a live cigarette in Plant Premises. HQO cautioned
the Depot Manager and Depot Officers to be careful in future to avoid
recurrence of such incidents and commended Reno 20 W 45 for his timely
action and exemplary courage. In the following DPC (Departmental
Promotion Committee) meeting Reno 20 W 45 was promoted, out of turn, as
Senior Plant Manager.
============================================================
Chapter 2
Internal and External Oil Mafia
Tapri
village, made famous for heat and lust by apolaustic Reno and callipygian Butterfly, had three Oil companies:
SPCL- Superior Petroleum Corp. Ltd, GPCL-Glorious Petroleum… and NPCL-National
Petroleum. Mami, Tandi and Butterfly were Contractor /Transporter Topi Pissoo’s
employees. Mami and Topi Pissoo had worked in all three Companies since the
time the companies were owned by the Americans and the British.
Many
Taprians, like most Indians, were incurably attracted towards white skinned women.
Butterfly was the White legacy of the past. But nobody knew about the type of
legacy- Superior, Glorious or National?
Mami never revealed who he was - A British or an American. Officially Butterfly
was owned by Reno, whatever Tandi may be claiming boastfully about his passionate
triumphs.
Bapu
and his friends used to play Gilli Danda, oblivious to Tapri, with local youth
just outside LPG Plant in an open field on Sundays. On such a Sunday morning,
Reno and Butterfly were serenely enjoying rain dance in the thick green belt,
beneath the perpetually leaking overhead tank constructed by Topi Pissoo.
At
the same time, beguiling Mami went on a
Special duty, ‘on SPCL duty’ , for two days
and one night to a nearby City with crapulous Satak Pal Sen, Chief Plant Manager, in a
white ambassador sponsored by Topi Pissoo; who had got all his Tank-Trucks/Jeeps/Cars
painted with the caption ‘On SPCL duty’.
The moment the ambassador car, carrying the Grand Ambassadors of SPCL, left
Civilization behind; Satak and Mami also left the garb of civilities behind.
Chabi,
a philosopher and the driver, was now wide awake to record the proceedings. Satak
noted after some time that Chabi was ogling at them through the rear mirror.
Satak went berserk. He spat tobacco and spouted ‘C’ rated English abuses learnt
from his Phirangi bosses through his
serrated teeth in a spectacular style that could be bettered
successfully only by Reno. Of course
Reno deserved to be promoted, Chabi pondered while tilting the mirror, now concentrating
only on the sounds…
While
‘on SPCL duty’; Mami did not have any job in the day time in that City.
So she
decided to meet the legendary Suren Chor, her first cousin and No. 1
Pick-pocket of the region. Fortunately, Suren Chor was neither on
‘tour’
nor in ‘Sarkari Guest House’. Mami explained about the abundance of Oil
in Tapri,
her connections with Satak / Topi Pissoo and Butterfly’s connection with
Reno. Aging
Suren Chor liked it.
Mami
returned home with Satak. Suren Chor followed the very next day with two of his
brightest disciples Changu and Mangu. All three of them were now ‘on SPCL
duty’.
Suren
Chor took the blessings from Darogaji (Police Inspector- Tapri) and Topi Pissoo.
Changu and Mangu started learning fast from Techno Tandi about Petroleum
products. Within a month Suren Chor established his business outside the Depots
and LPG Plant. He just organized all 10 to 15 small operators under one
umbrella-Tapri Petroleum Company-the TPC.
Changu
was in charge of the Railway Siding behind the Depots / LPG Plant from where
his team used to ‘cut’ the products from Pipelines and Railway wagons. Mangu
was responsible to ‘cut’ products from tankers of all the Oil companies leaving
the Depots situated in a row on a Highway. The drivers of the tankers were thrilled;
their ‘cut’ was sold right in front of the Depots!
Suren
Chor first opened his Office and Sales Counter behind Bandhu’s dhaba .The sales
zoomed beyond expectations due to the price differential and Suren Chor’s
marketing skills. He opened another Outlet, on the eve of Republic day, just in
front of LPG Plant’s Officers Residential Complex on the Highway. Within a
month, daily Sales Volume of TPC reached 4000 litres of various Products.
Bapu,
the Safety Engineer, was the only person who had problems with this arrangement
in front of his flat. He could see the empty and filled oil cans of various
sizes in different colors swaying to and fro for the whole day. Bapu complained
to Reno and Satak. They scolded him to mind his own business. He complained to
the Depot Managers of all oil companies too. But they refused to do any thing as the illegal
activities, according to them, were taking place outside their respective Depots.
After
a few weeks, he wrote letters to SPCL HQO. Sent several reminders. No body responded.
Dejected, he approached Darogaji to lodge an FIR. Darogaji refused to accept
the complaint as it was not signed by Depot Manager or Chief Plant Manager.
Furious
Darogaji informed Satak about the audacity of Bapu to contact him. Contumelious Satak
fulminated hysterically,” Boss is always right, Boss is always right, Boss is
always right…”.
Coming to senses at last, he called Reno and explained to him
about the scandal- an Officer going against the wishes of Satak! Reno was devastated,
such a betrayal by his own subordinate! Tandi, Mami and Butterfly were
summoned. Satak winked at Mami. Mami left the room like a ghost and reached
Bandhu’s Dhaba. Suren Chor called Mangu. Mangu executed the plan perfectly.
Several
bones in legs, hands, face and ribs broken; Bapu was rushed to a hospital in a very
critical state by compassionate Reno and others. The news spread like today’s
Kolaveri D. Khajulal, CMD-SPCL, humanitarian Buddy Noora- Director Personal, Shekhar Raj-
Director Marketing all came to know about the incidence. Emotional Buddy Noora
directly instructed Satak to ensure that
Bapu survives.
( Bapu used to ask his friends if vegetarians eat vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat!?)
Buddy
Noora, the humanitarian thought, it was a big crisis for SPCL. An Officer showing disrespect to
all important Hierarchy. It was a Corporate blasphemy not to worship the
bosses. An Officer trying to lodge an FIR! It was a severe crime of
insubordination and bringing the good name of great SPCL to disrepute. Such an
Officer had to be taught a lesson so that no Officer could ever dare to take
such negative actions in future. Bapu had to be charge-sheeted for others to
see. So Bapu had to survive first.
Suren
Chor, his team, drivers, transporters and many others celebrated the victory.
Mangu was hailed as the much needed ‘Mafia’ for the community. Now he was known
as Mangu ‘Mapia’. The Sales of TPC jumped to 7000 litres per day after Mangu Mapia’s
great strike.
Satak
instructed Reno to prepare a cyclostyled letter to all employees of SPCL about
the great betrayal by Bapu. Reno complied and letters to all 9000 employees in
the Country were sent the very next day.
Khajulal,
Buddy Noora, Shekhar Raj and all other big shots decided to have a meeting at
Tapri the very next week to correct the situation. In any case they had to
attend Topi Pissoo’s son’s marriage. Now they had an excuse to visit Tapri
together. Topi Pissoo was delighted!
=====================================
Chapter3
File Note to Pile Currency Note
Satak,
the Chief Manager, and Reno the Senior Manager were eternally grateful blokes. Appreciating
Topi’s services, they decided to have yet another massive Overhead tank constructed
by 'Topi Pissoo Mehta’ the Contractor. Approval to construct the tank on single
quotation basis was not a problem. SPCL had a beautiful, dutiful system
of generating ‘File Notes’ so as to ‘pile notes’ with impunity.
A
blank ‘File Note’ is a thick
sheet with several dotted lines on which thick-skinned bosses sign to hilariously justify some
utterly unjustifiable actions like: out of turn promotions/transfers, placement
of Orders on single quotation basis on exorbitantly higher rates, enhancement of Kerosene Quota in cities where
no body uses kerosene, reconstitution/resitement/appointment/termination of
dealerships , writing off huge stock losses/bad debts in hundreds of Crores,
relaxation in payment terms for big industrial houses including famed Airlines, sending chosen Officers
to Europe for training in LPG Operations in India, reimbursement of air travel /
hotel expenses of Ministry Officials, purchase of expensive gifts for various Govt.
Agencies etc etc…
Topi
sponsored bosses’ air travel and the five star hotel stay in Nachpur, the
district headquarters of Tapri village. (Bosses got the bills reimbursed from
SPCL also and pocketed the money matter of factly, without evincing any trace of eructation...) Topi
arranged a lavish party in bosses’ favorite and an exclusive nude Cabaret Joint-
Bhogi Bar-pride of Nachpur District, frequented by Politicians, Govt. Servants and
desi Oil magnates.
The
file note to construct the Overhead tank was originated by Reno, recommended by
Satak and handed over to Topi for taking the approval from the bosses. Topi
gave the File Note to Shanno, the star performer of Bhogi Bar and darling of
the bosses. Shanno, Julie, Gulbadan and many others arrived, performed and
pleased the bosses as planned by Topi, Satak and Reno.
Shanno, the ecdysiast, finally showed her designer ‘latke-jhatke’; covering her coveted body with only a 'file
note'. Accustomed to these desi Oil Magnates, she too knew how to pile currency notes
from file notes. She ensured that nobody touched her before signing on the File
Note. The bosses sitting in the innermost ring appreciated the game of ‘paper
strip’ teasing .They first stylishly threw the notes, sponsored by Topi, on
Shanno. Then, they attacked on the file note granting their approvals hurriedly
without looking at the body of the File Note. But, the other body in question did
not escape their probing eyes & hands…
Satak,
Reno and Topi, sitting in the middle ring were harmoniously singing just
released the then Doordarshan Hit, “Mile Sur Mera Tumhara …” to the every step
taken by Shanno, Julie and Gulbadan.
The
knowledgeable audience of SPCL Officers sitting on the periphery appreciated
Topi Pissoo Mehta by singing: ‘Jai Mehta
Di, Jai Mehta Di!’. As the chorus gained momentum, Shanno and other dancers
started enchanting the bosses with their plastic love. Excited and ecstatic bosses
also started chanting sacredly in mesmerized tones: ‘Jai Mehta di, Jai Me’ta di!’.
Mighty
thrilled Topi thanked his stars and roared most religiously, as was his wont:
“Jai Mata di!”.
The SPCL community reverberated heartily: “Jai Me’ta di!”.
===========================================================
Chapter4
Scam-Dev and Scam-ayani
Bapu
was still in Hospital, though out of danger now. He had also been invited for
the Party. But Bapu, the ‘arrogant traitor’, chose comforts of the hospital to
the ‘spiritual’ luxury of Bhogi Bar! In SPCL, all Parties involving “Spirits
and Salsa" by Sirens used to be called ‘Spiritual Parties’.
As
per the procedures of SPCL, he should have informed the bosses in writing about
his inability to attend the meeting. As such, the Party at Bhogi Bar was an
Official Review Meet of all Officers (around 50) of SPCL Tapri Complex! Satak
and Reno were thrilled that Bapu could now be easily served a Charge Sheet
against ‘Insubordination and unauthorized absenteeism’ for not attending the Party/meeting!
Tired
but gratified bosses after the action-packed night at Bhogi Bar spent the next
day shopping, discussing about Shanno et al; and attending the all important
Topison’s marriage.
Meanwhile,
Satak and Reno were in Office preparing for the meeting to take place the
very next day where the only item in the agenda was: the enemy no.1 of SPCL-
Bapurao alias Bapu. Satak was hysterical as usual and was shouting –“Bapu is a
stupid and frustrated fellow! Boss is always right, Boss is always right…”
Reno
20 W 45 eagerly bowed down by 45 degrees and pleaded Satak to just calm down. And
then to please his boss Satak, Reno magically brandished Bapu’s bright orange diary; which was stolen the
previous night from Bapu’s flat by Team Techno Tandi under the able guidance of
Miss Butterfly Reno 20 W 45.
Satak
really calmed down and even smiled seeing the diary. Now he could read Bapu’s
mind! They started reading a short article written by Bapu in his diary with a heading ‘Scam-ayani’. Bapu
had referred in the article: Satak as Scam-Dev, Mami as Scam-ayani, Reno as
Scam-Putra, Butterfly as Scam-ya, Shekhar Raj as Scum –Dev, , File Notes as
Scam-Sutra, official meetings as Scam-Kreeda and other bosses variously as
Scamsters, scammers, scamps, scam -uck
etc on the lines of Hindi words Kamdev, Kamsutra, Kamayani,Kamuk etc.
After
reading the article, Satak, yet again went berserk. ‘Satak Satak gaya’ so to
say in Hindi. He started scam-pering in his room frantically. So, now, Reno too
had to scam-per incessantly; following his boss bit by bit. Within no time
Satak was shouting in stentorian tones: –“Bapu is stupid …! Boss is always
right…”.This time Reno just could not come to grips with Satak so he had to dash
away calling out Mami.
Mami
entered into the room and Satak into tranquility. Reno preferred to spend rest
of the day in his flat with Butterfly. Satak kept on shouting at regular
interval and Mami continued to sedate him in her own Scam-ayani manner.
Late
in the night Satak and Reno attended the marriage. But here too, after seeing
Bapu’s three friends, Satak went crackers. Every time he saw those three, he became
frenzied and started shouting. Shekhar Raj would just lift his right hand and
Satak will go noiseless. The game went on till the dinner was over.
After
the dinner, when all the guests, lesser Officers of SPCL and even the Topi’s family
members had gone; Topi Pissoo and the drunken Grand Ambassadors of SPCL
gathered around the pool. CMD Khajulal was continuing to drink Bloody Mary and
eat Kaju (Cashew nuts) well one hour after the dinner. By now, his mouth was looking
like famous ugly grease Plant of SPCL in a coastal town.
Out of the blue,
Khajulal jumped in the pool and started swimming fully dressed without stopping
to eat Kaju. All others followed the action without wasting even seconds. Topi
Pissoo Mehta Shouted devotedly: “Jai Maata Di!”. The whole swimming pool
erupted faithfully and unfailingly: “Jai Me’ta di”.
====================================
Chapter 5
Cosmic dance
by a comic dunce .
Within
a month of operation of TPC ( Tapri Petroleum Company), Suren Chor had earned a
second hand tank-truck from Topi Pissoo, the President of Nachpur District Tank
Truck Owners-Drivers- Cleaners Association. Suren Chor was made the Secretary
of the association and Mangu Mapia was designated Treasurer. Changu was no
where in the reckoning.
Mangu
Mapia had already started collecting Rs 20=00
from every Tank Truck driver for every trip made in any of the Depots;
in his holy bid to protect their birthright to cut the petroleum products from
all the tank trucks and Depots.
By
now, Changu had started feeling left out by Suren Chor and Mangu Mapia. Chabi, a philosopher and also Pissoo’s driver
was getting closer and closer to Changu. Chabi wanted to remain a Tank Truck
driver for ever but Pissoo promoted him as a Car driver considering Chabi’s
intellect. Chabi wanted money, not status. Thus, Chabi’s plan to become rich quick
was shattered brutally by Pissoo.
The
Association painted the whole Tapri red in honor of CMD and Directors. All
association members were neatly clad in new white Kurta Pajama purchased by themselves.
Gandhi Topis (Caps) were provided by Topi Pissoo, obviously! They had also
constructed a stage just outside LPG Plant to felicitate the SPCL bosses
gratefully; for having facilitated them to cut the products from Depots with impunity
despite Bapu’s written complaints.
Since
morning, the loud speaker had started playing patriotic songs at full volume.
Topi, the patron, was humming constantly- ‘Mile Sur Mera Tumhara’. Suren Chor
was singing most patriotically- ‘Mere desh ki Dharti ugle Petrol Diesel...’.
Mangu
Mapia was high on Bhang (Cannabis sativa) and was playing ‘holi’ with himself
and the Drivers / cleaners since morning. He did not stop dancing and singing for
Suren Chor even for a moment. It was like a cosmic dance by a comic dunce for a
chronic dense; savored by all.
At
the same time, Changu started moving surreptitiously towards Chandpur; the
other end being Nachpur. He had a five liter Oil can in his hand, when he was
last seen.
The Caravan
of 15 cars, carrying three bosses, reached Tapri at 11.30 A.M as they got
delayed because of salutation at every Petrol Pump enroute. Suren Chor and
Mangu Mapia presented a memorandum about the problems created by Bapu and his
three friends in the name of Safety for not only the LPG plant’s Tank Truck
drivers but also for the Petrol/Diesel drivers working in the adjacent Oil Depot.
Topi
also submitted a memo regarding his long pending bills against several
constructions in LPG Plant not cleared by Bapu; despite clear instructions
given by Reno and Satak. Shekhar Raj and humanitarian buddy Noora, on behalf of Khajulal, assured
Topi that such indiscipline will not be tolerated.
As
the bosses were about to enter into the Plant; there was a huge explosion just
outside LPG plant at Chandpur end. Consequently, the dry grass out side the
Plant caught fire and the flames reached up to the height of fifty feet. The
flames continued to erupt threatening to enter into the LPG Plant and Depots.
There was utter pandemonium on the stage. Wooden stage, constructed by Topi at
the cost of SPCL, collapsed and all hell broke loose.
Mami
and Butterfly, not on the stage, rushed to Bandhu’s dhaba. Suren Chor and Mangu
Mapia ran in the direction of Chandpur, in search of Changu.
Except
Chabi, all drivers of Tank Trucks and 15 cars ran in the direction towards
Nachpur. Chabi seemed to be mentally prepared for the accident. He was standing
just near his car. He hopped into the car hurriedly and began to honk the horn hard
and hysterically to help holy honchos reach at hotel hastily. Topi and the
bosses heroically got up on their feet and got themselves deposited in the
Ambassador Car.
Heavy-weights
gone, Satak Pal Sen started running from one end of the main gate of 50 ft length to the other end
without entering into the Plant. Throughout he was shouting – Fire! Fire!!
Fire!!! Reno was following Satak inch by inch and decibel by decibel. This
continued for ten minutes though the fire got extinguished on its own within 7
-8 minutes.
Chabi
dropped them into the Hotel in Nachpur -15 Kms away from Tapri. A message for
them was awaiting- The fire had already been extinguished. The Manager of the
Hotel informed them that two journalists were also waiting for them to enquire
about some fire in Tapri. Humanitarian Noora, the more intelligent among them, realizing the
problem, dropped Topi at the Hotel to sort out the journo and ordered Chabi to
immediately rush back to Tapri....
====================================
Chapter 6
Scam Kreeda
The
meeting, the Scam-Kreeda, finally started at Tapri at 3 O’clock after lavish
lunch en-route. Satak continued to chew tobacco and ruminate while looking
furtively at Mami peeping from the nearby window. Mami was looking at Noora, Noora
was looking at Khaju, and Khaju was more interested in eating Kaju. But Reno
had to sacrifice Butterfly and his spit before he could start the show.
“Dear
friends, time has come to choose to be an Aasoul or a wet blanket like Bapu. If you
want to play Golf with us, choose to be an Aasoul. If you wish not to grow and
continue playing ‘Gilli danda’; follow the dirty path chosen by Bapu. If you
want to believe that Satak sir is a pompous jerk, brash, conceited, apolaustic,devoted to
lord Bacchus, an imposter, a womanizer and what not; you may think so. But look
at our great corporate history; all successful bosses have evinced the same characteristics!
And the Corporation has only progressed! To some rigid, useless and negative
Officers; Satak Sir may be just an Aasoul. But our bosses have highest regard
for him, for he is the face of the Company. If negative people want to call me Aasoul,
I take it as a complement because all my successful superiors are like that
only. And I am proud of them.”
Shekhar
rose up to deliver his speech. “Corporation is giving you Salary, Perks and all
‘facilities’, you need not think beyond Company. There are Officers who talk
about Country and countrymen, though they take salary from this company! We do
not need such ‘arrogant traitors’! Here at local level Satak and Reno are doing
a great job. Satak at 45 is the Present and Reno at 30 is the future of the Company.
You all should support them. Thinking about what is good for Country is none of
your business.”
Now
it was the turn of the learned, intelligent and emotional, humanitarian Buddy Noora to inform
about the roll out of the future HR Programs of SPCL. “I fully concur with Reno...
I should say that it was a bold and great Aasoulian logic to covey the simple
underlying philosophy of the Corporate World in general and Oil Sector in particular.
“We
emphatically intend to start a centre of learning on the abstract
subject of ‘Aasoulian Intelligence’ so that other Corporate, especially Oil
Companies, world wide are also benefitted. I am going to have detailed discussion
with Reno how to develop the subject of Aasoulian Intelligence for which we
will soon begin with a project tentatively named APE. We are also going to fund
for research in this pioneering field with the premier Management Institutes
of the World.
“Regarding
Bapu, we are going to serve him a Charge Sheet against ‘Insubordination and unauthorized
absenteeism’ tomorrow itself through Reno. As far as his three indisciplined
friends Tej, Kola and Vira are concerned, we are only transferring them to NE, North Zone and
South Zone far away from their residences as per the Section 17.6.1 of the Transfer
Policy according to which a transfer can take place any time any where at the
discretion of the Management of SPCL.
We
have issued them warning letters. They have accepted their grave mistake of
being Bapu’s friend. They have also given in writing that they will never be
associated with the ‘traitor’ in future. That’s all from HR point of view.”
Satak
hinted all Officers to leave. Now only the bosses, Satak, Reno and lowly learned, certificates accumulator, rain coat wearing, tobacco chewing, Machiavellian Bean Counter cum HR Officer Pujya Doshi were left.
There were a few File notes to be signed for the betterment of the Corporation
and the Country. They all signed merrily on the File Notes to pile notes…
Topi
called from Hotel and informed Satak that he had taken care of the journalists
and that he had arranged an action packed ‘Spiritual’ party at Bhogi’s Bar in
the evening inviting the Journos also so as to ensure that SPCL does not earn
negative publicity. Satak Pal Sen began to pirouette.
As Topi was not around, so Reno shouted religiously- Jai Maata di!! The
bosses had a hearty laughter …!!!
====================================
Chapter 7
A
dancing pro becomes a P.R.O.
===================================
Chapter 8
Biking-An urge to surge ahead
Biking may mean differently to different people but
essentially, it is just an urge to surge ahead; for good or bad. Whether a
biker is a young one, a pick-pocket, Oil Mafioso or a Spiritual Baba; the urge
remains the same. There was no dearth of this holy urge in Tapri Oil Complex
too. Internal and External Oil Mafia- all of them were into bikes and biking;
predominantly because of free availability of petrol for them at Tapri Oil
Complex.
For Reno, the Hero, biking meant an urge to merge with
Butterfly on his bike in Tapri Forest or on any wide open highway. For oldie
Satak Pal Sen biking was quite nostalgic. It reminded the urge to splurge
in ‘Santra & Soda with Mami’ in good old halcyon days of erstwhile American
Oil Company; on Nachpur Roads full of pot holes. Every pot hole had bestowed
him an opportunity to come spiritually closer to the pillion lady Mami.
Suren Chor had an Enfield (Bullet) which, years ago, he had
to reluctantly lift from Kumbh Mela at Haridwar, after pick-pocketing a rich
devotee; to survive an imminent attack from a chasing Police Party.Now, he had
brought the heavily made over Bullet to Tapri in his new avatar as an Oil Mafia
king.
Suren Chor, the biker, loved to compare himself with MF
Hussain the painter, as they both were discalced i.e. they walked barefoot.
According to him, both of them were ‘finger artists’. Suren Chor always boasted
that he was a better artist, as Hussain could never indulge in biking barefoot
on Indian streets. Moreover, he felt superior that his art was instantly
rewarding. He also believed that it was birthright of every pick-pocket to
excel in biking as both the arts required sophisticated fingers-hand-eye
coordination.
Just after the fire broke outside LPG Plant, Suren Chor and
Mangu Mapia had started to run behind disgruntled Changu who, at the behest and
instance of Topi Pissoo’s car driver Chabi, had set the fire outside Tapri LPG
Plant. (As Changu was neglected by Suren Chor and Mangu Mapia; he wanted to
embarrass them in front of SPCL bosses from HQO. Chabi had a grudge against his
promotion by Topi as a car driver. Obviously Chabi was much better off
financially as a Tank Truck Driver.)
Aging Suren Chor could run barely a few meters and caved in.
Mangu ran in reverse direction to reach at Bandhu’s dhaba to pick his bike. By
now, Darogaji too had reached there on his bike. Darogaji chose to follow
disgruntled Changu, leaving his Police Party to systematically supervise the
already extinguished fire. Incidentally, the extinguished fire was yet again
extinguished one hour later by Nachpur Fire Brigade.
Suren Chor, lying supine, saw Changu emerging from the
nearby cotton-fields to board a bus towards Chandpur. Within a minute Darogaji
and Mangu Mapia arrived. Suren Chor sat at the pillion of Darogaji. The bikers
were now on the verge to surge ahead to purge Changu’s dissension forever.
They did not take much time to overtake the bus. Changu was
forced to get down form the bus and was taken to interior of Tapri forest.
Suren Chor, the mentor of Changu and Mangu, now had to discipline Changu. No
benevolence could be expected from Oil Mafia against such a crime of
betrayal.
Changu was beaten dreadfully by three of them. He
immediately revealed the name of Chabi as his accomplice. Now, they competed
with each other in riding the two bikes over Changu’s body and face. His whole
body was desperately flattened and mutilated. The lethal game continued for two
hours. Finally, Mangu Mapia took out petrol from fuel tank of his bike and set
the dead body afire.
While returning, Darogaji and Suren Chor began to sing “Ye
dosti hum nahin todenge” on Darogaji’s bike in Jai-Veeru-Sholey style! Mangu
Mapia smiled wryly. This was the song Changu and Mangu had been singing for the
past five years in front of their boss Suren Chor! Mangu, probably, wanted to
sing a dirge for Changu, but ultimately the urge to surge ahead prevailed.
By the time they returned, Chabi had left Tapri to drop the
bosses at the Hotel. Darogaji could not spare more time for second ‘thrilling
biking exercise’ despite having an urge…
He requested Suren Chor and Mangu Mapia to go behind Chabi
right away. The second chase of the day had begun. The power bikers were now on
prowl…
Chabi had to be taught a lesson for the Oil Mafia to survive
at Tapri. But Chabi was no Changu!
========================================================
Chapter 9
An eternal urge to emerge as a winner.
Chabi was son of a rich farmer in Chamoli region of UP
Hills, now a part of Uttarakhand. His father wanted him to be an engineer.
Chabi too was very much interested in automobiles and biking. While he could
not be selected in a Govt. Eng. college in UP, his father ensured to send him
in a Private Engineering College in Central India by paying a huge Capitation
fees as per the prevailing trend in late eighties.
For Chabi life just meant biking. No body was
interested to know his real name. He always had his bike keys (Chabi) in his
hands so his friends started calling him Chabi. He was also known as Chamoli
biker. The short form was again Chabi. In fact, his chubby cheeks also
justified this name.
He scrupulously enjoyed his life, mostly about biking,
in the College without being interested in academics. Though he was intelligent
and knowledgeable, finally he had to leave college without completion of
degree. Soon his father disowned him. As an engineering college drop out, first
of all he started as a bike-mechanic being a bike aficionado. But that was not
enough to meet his expenses.
While repairing bikes of Oil mafia of Tapri, he
realized it was a great idea to be a Tank Truck driver to enhance his otherwise
languishing career. He managed to impress Topi Pissoo, the Contractor Cum
Transporter of SPCL. Topi liked him and made him driver. He remained driver of
a Tank truck for three years. Within a year he had purchased a second hand
Yamaha and now had enough money to survive for several months.
Topi’s daughter Kammo was very much attracted to
Chabi’s pleasing personality, his bike and his biking attitude. She thought
Chabi was too sophisticated to be a Tank Truck driver. Hence Chabi was promoted
as a Car driver which Chabi dissented to a great extent. While Chabi also liked
her, the love story could never start due to Chabi’s lack of enterprise.
Chabi had come to know that Suren Chor, Darogaji and
Mangu Mapia had gone bike chasing in search of Changu. He knew the meaning of
this bike chase.
He dropped the SPCL bosses at their hotel, parked the
car at hotel leaving the keys in the car itself and rushed to his one room
house in an auto without waiting for a Cycle rickshaw. He collected his
valuables in a bag and kick-started his Yamaha bike to leave Nachpur for good.
He had just accelerated the bike when he saw Mangu
Mapia and Suren Chor approaching him from behind on Mangu’s bike. They were
only fifty meters behind him. He wanted to maintain at least that distance till
he could reach the highway.
He maneuvered his bike adroitly through the crowd at a
great speed. Mangu was no inferior in this game. Still Mangu was not able to
reduce the distance. Within no time they were on highway.
Chabi knew both the bikes were powered by the stolen
Petrol from SPCL depot at Tapri. But there was a huge difference. Mangu’s bike
was powered by stolen ‘SE grade’ PSU Engine Oil from Tapri. On the contrary
Chabi’s bike was rather ‘empowered’ by a much better ‘SF grade’ of a private
lubricating Oil company; which was the best available Lubricant grade at that
time. Soon, it became one sided race. The distance between both the bikes
went on increasing.
Still Chabi was petrified. He did not even dare to
look back for the first two hours, though Mangu had stopped chasing him after
first twenty Kilometers only.
For Chabi, now biking meant just an urge to emerge as
a survivor.
Chabi drove for the whole evening and stopped at a
very famous and crowded dhaba on the National Highway leading from Nachpur to
UP around 1-00 AM. He got the bike tank filled by purchasing petrol for
the first time in last three years and slept for four hours at the dhaba amidst
a large no. of drivers and cleaners sleeping on the Charpais (Wooden and jute
beds).
He got up early in the morning in an effervescent mood
and began to bike singing the song originally sung by John Denver- ‘Country
roads take me home’. He had heard it in college days from friends. He always
ensured to change ‘Shenandoah River ’with ‘Alakhnanda River’ in his version. As
Haridwar was approaching fast, he began to sing Garhwali and Hindi songs
glorifying mountains and holy rivers.
Once he passed Rishikesh, he began to wonder about the
wastage of biking time in Central India. For him the Mountain biking was a
rediscovery. The more he biked and sang the songs, more nostalgic he became. He
soon realized mountain biking comes in package including: Mountain rivers,
vegetables, specialty fruits, panoramic vistas of snow clad mountains, blooming
Rhododendron (Buransh in Hindi), meandering roads, Garhwali- Kumauni Cuisine,
songs-music, festivals, Mountain fragrance etc. Overwhelmed by the new
experience, Chabi finally decided to become a Baba- ‘Chabi wale Baba’ without
deciding the exact place of settlement in UP-Hills.
The whole episode turned his biking philosophy to a
higher degree. Now, Biking was not just Biking but was Mountain Biking with an
eternal urge to emerge as a Champion.
( More about Chabi, Kammo, Topi and other characters
associated with Chabi in the future articles.)
========================================
Chapter 10
'Flash' Players and 'Flesh' Players of eighties
On
that eventful day, when Changu conducted fire-raising ceremony outside LPG
Plant in his endeavor to be a shining star like Mangu Mapia, but could manage
to become only a dead star; a lot of curious events took place inside LPG Plant
also.
The
life of Workers/Officers was quite normal despite the bosses’ arrival at
Nachpur. Almost all of them were on duty without Uniform.The Local Union
leader DM Yadu, dressed in broken white Kurta Pajama and a sparkling white
Gandhi cap, was issuing sermons against Corruption by Satak/Reno and also about
lack of Safety arrangements in the Plant. Nobody was listening to him; as usual.
They had much better things to do.
Half
of them were busy playing 'Flash' (card game) or Carom in the Canteen, as usual. Three of
them were fully drunk and were sleeping on the floor at canteen, just behind
the ‘Flash’ Players. The more important ‘Flesh’ Players like Satak, Mami, Reno
and Butterfly were busy outside the Plant. Reno 20W45 had strategically
deployed Techno Tandi, the ‘Flesh’ Player, inside the Plant.
Michael
and Raje were joking, poking around in gay abandon. The shift clerk, before
making the Invoice, was haggling with a truck driver who was not willing to
give more than Rs. 10 for a lucrative trip. A worker responsible to unload bulk
LPG from LPG tankers was not willing to release the tanker without getting Rs.
100 from the driver. So the situation was quite normal. Snafu.
The
oldies, having completed their eight hour job in one hour, were singing Bhajans
in the far end of the filling shed, far away from Canteen / Administrative
Block; using the new empty cylinders as Ghatam and Tabla –- Radhe! Radhe!!
Younger ones were watching pornographic albums behind the stacks of cylinders –
Babe! Babe!!
The
younger ones had gratefully collected the albums from generous Tandi who
received the bonanza from Butterfly. Those albums were the precious gifts from
Reno20W45 to beloved Butterfly. Reno had inherited just a part of this huge
‘property’ from Satak Pal Sen. Satak had painstakingly accumulated the treasure
, Black and white and color albums on glossy expensive sheets; from various
dealers, transporters, contractors, suppliers of SPCL over a period of two
decades. He had only parted with the duplicate ones to his dear and worthy disciple
Reno.
These
honest workers were not claiming any over time expenses for such activities
being done during duty time. A few LPG Operators while sitting/squatting on LPG
cylinders, were over-filling/under-filling the cylinders on the carousel (the
machine on which cylinders are filled); without really bothering about Tare
weight or Gross Weight of Cylinders. Satak and Reno could terrorize the
Officers at will but not the permanent Workers of SPCL.
In
any case, Production was more important to Satak, Reno and their bosses. Stock
loss was never an issue in SPCL, but ‘Satak Loss’ was a huge issue for one and
all in Tapri.
Tata
Steels used to assert in their famous and charming advertisement in the late
eighties- ‘We also make Steel’, in Hindi: ‘Ispat bhi hum banate hein’. The
proud workers of SPCL LPG Plant also used to articulate the same sentiments
without any fear of plagiarism: ‘We also fill Cylinders’. [So what if the
cylinders were half filled, overfilled or defective?]
Contractors’
labor were doing Permanent workers’ tedious jobs like handling of filled, empty
and defective Cylinders. They were also catering to the needs of all permanent
Workers/Officers. One of them was assigned the job of cooling drinking water.
(There were no coolers for workers /Officers inside the LPG Filling Shed). He
was cooling water jugs by opening a half
inch LPG pipeline from the ubiquitous LPG Pipeline network and showering jets
of LPG generously on the lower half of the jugs to produce the desired cooling
effect. This way only several hundred kg LPG was used in a day for the welfare
of hardly working SPCL employees. As mentioned earlier, Stock loss was never an
issue in SPCL. The bigger issue was 'Satak Loss'.
The
Officers, sitting on the LPG Cylinders in the Filling Shed, were discussing
about Local Tapri politics and whining about certain ‘Chitting and Fissing
allowances’ introduced in similar Govt. Oil Companies NPCL and GPCL but denied so
far by the SPCL Management. Some of them were philosophical but a few of them
were agitated that Reno, despite being Junior to them, had superseded all of
them by several grades. This whining, grumbling was just a customary part of
every day routine. Snafu, yet again.
In a
cricket Match between Officers and Workers on last Independence Day,
Chakrawarti Kumar the Manager- Plant was found to be chucking. The workers
began to call him Chucker. On the same day while fielding, he failed miserably
to catch cricket Ball (Batti, in workers’ language). But he revealed his
capability to grab a crab (chakkar batti, in workers’ jargon) from the wet
outfield. He further demonstrated how to eat it raw. They all began to call him
Chucker Batti. Satak liked the name.
This
is how Chakrawarti Kumar became Chucker Batti.
Manager
–Plant, Chucker Batti, was the next in Command. As Satak and Reno were just
outside LPG Plant waiting to welcome the learned bosses; it was Chucker Batti
–Chucker Batti all the way.
============================================================
Chapter 11
How to grab a crab-- Chucker Batti
Techno
Tandi, Butterfly’s true lover, had grown Mint leaves & green chilies in a
small area in the perennial ‘wet-land’ below the eternally leaking overhead
water-tank constructed by Topi Pissoo. The ‘wet-land’ was exclusively used by
Butterfly, Reno, Tandi and Chucker Batti for cultural activities like rain
dance and daily local food festivals.
The
whole local ‘wetland’ had a large no. of land / terrestrial crabs that elsewhere
in Tapri used to come up out of hibernation only after Monsoon. Techno Tandi was
unofficial caretaker of the ‘wet-land’ & crabs. While he had learnt from
Chucker Batti how to eat live crab; he was now far ahead in the knowledge and
practice of ‘crabbing’; leaving the art of cribbing to the successful SPCL Officers.
Reno found the crabs very cute. The
day he saw a full size crab for the first time, he was sure about his second
car- the vintage ‘landcrab’ (BMC ADO17), made in
England.
Those
capriciously lateral/forward moving weird creatures, like many of the bosses in
SPCL, were ultimate fear factor food for most of the people in Tapri but not to
Tandi, Butterfly, Reno and Chucker Batti who used to enjoy local food festival of
crabs, cooked or raw, in the ‘wet-land’ every other day.
As
Butterfly and Reno were busy outside the Plant in managing the ‘extravaganza’
for the bosses; Chucker Batti was quite upbeat at the prospect to grab a larger
and better crab. Tandi caught a fully grown crab, dressed it with mint leaves,
green chilies and some salt always available in his pocket. Chucker Batti had a
pathetic -hungry and ravenous- face while watching Techno Tandi handling the live
crab so deftly.
Tandi
offered the first one, a pale yellowish crab, to Chucker Batti. He did grab the
drab crab, removed the scab, began to dab the flab of the live crab, and then
finally put a large slab of the crab in his mouth. He pleasantly felt a part of
the crab wriggling around in his mouth in a green pool of mint leaves and green
chilies. He closed his eyes and began to thank God for giving him an
opportunity like this to savor such a delicious crab. For the rest of the day,
now he could blab about the crab he was just having.
The
moment Chucker Batti was having the sensation of the third crab wriggling in his mouth,
the Security Officer blew the siren as he saw huge flames outside the Plant. The
pleasure was so heavenly that Chucker Batti found the sound of Siren melodious
and in sync with the exotic experience he was having through the wriggling crab
in his mouth. As Chucker Batti did not respond to the siren; Tandi thought it
was just a mock fire drill. They both continued to devour the crabs like today's Suresh
and Ramesh eating Cadbury chocolate in a trance.
Factotum Techno Tandi, just one of the Contractor labor but extremely essential to Butterfly
and LPG Plant Operations, heard a lot of workers screaming. Tandi soon realized
that something had really gone wrong. He instructed Chucker Batti to take control of
the situation at the main gate.
Chucker Batti followed Tandi’s instructions most
loyally and reached at Main Gate to see Satak and Reno running from one end to
the other end of the Main Gate, from outside, while shouting ‘Fire-Fire’. He tenaciously
joined them inch by inch and decibel by decibel. The only variation was that he
was shouting ‘fire-fire’, with the last crab still in his mouth, from the
inside of the closed Main Gate.
As
the crab melted in his mouth, the reality also did in his mind .He began to
shake in his pants as he knew there was almost no water in the huge Underground
Tank or even the smaller Capacity eternally leaking Overhead Tank Constructed
by Topi Pissoo…
The
water available was just enough for two-three minutes to fight against fire.
Whatever water was pumped daily from two bore wells was barely enough to take
care of the daily requirement of Plant mainly due to leak in both the tanks
since the inception of the Plant.
The
LPG Operators were thrilled to hear the sound of siren. They knew it will be
the end of the duty for them for the day. They stopped the carousel (the
machine at which cylinders are filled) at once. Hapless workers stopped playing
flash and carom. They all, except the three drunken ones, sprung to action.
They all knew there was practically no water to fight fire in case the fire
reaches inside the Plant. They had been taught by the Local Management that the
show must go on.
So,
they were ready for the show and ready to play Holi with each other- may be
just for only two-three minutes. Some connected the fire hoses to fire
hydrants; some reached at the fixed water monitors and began to wait for the
fire engine to start. Some took Fire Extinguishers and ran towards the fire.
The all knowing, raincoat wearing, Account Officer cum HR Officer Pujya Doshi - as per his role in the Fire Organization Chart- telephoned to
Police, fire-brigade, Civil Authorities, Ambulance and the neighboring Oil
Companies depots and ran out of Administrative Block to Security Block to help
the injured , if any. He cleared the traffic and a truck load of filled cylinders without documents at the main gate.Now he too was free to follow his bosses.
Union
leader DM Yadu ran towards the gate and saw the wooden platform collapsing and
the bosses falling. He then saw the actual fire from the inside. Now he rushed
to administrative Block and narrated the whole story over telephone to two
journalists of local news papers. (Kindly see the Chapter no. 7- A dancing pro
becomes a PRO about Journalists.)
Many
of the Officers rushed to fire engine to start it, without succeeding to start
it even after five minutes of blowing up of the danger siren. It was the duty
of Safety Engineer Bapurao to start the Fire engine but the 'arrogant traitor' was still in the Hospital.He certainly deserved one more Charge Sheet.
At
last Techno Tandi reached at the Fire Engine Room with a crab in his each hand
and one in mouth. He transferred the crab from the right hand to the left hand,
started the Fire Engine with his right hand within a few seconds without
letting go his precious grabs - the crabs.
They
all waited for two more minutes to see the pressure in the Pipelines develop.
The lines were not pressurized as Jockey Pump and the caretaker of the Jockey
Pump- Bapurao, both were under maintenance. After 7 minutes the lines were
fully pressurized and the Team –Tapri was finally in a position to fight fire
that had by now extinguished on its own.
The
workers, like their bosses, always believed that show must go on. They used
water in playing holi with each other till it was all exhausted. They all
missed to see Butterfly drenching.
( To be continued...)
